Stardew Valley comes to Magic: The Gathering and fans aren’t taking some of the new artwork well

The limited releases of cards for Magic: The Gathering that are mostly reskins of existing cards with new art are called Secret Lair drops. They’re infamous for selling out fast and being hard to get hold of at normal prices, and they’re also infamous for having unusual themes. There’s been a Monty Python one, a Dwarf Fortress one, and even a Garfield one. Next? Stardew Valley.

ConcernedApe’s quirky farm-life sim has a legion of dedicated fans who have built their own mimetic lore on top of the actual story of the game, like Overwatch stans interpreting and shipping characters in ways Blizzard didn’t intend. Take Elliott, for instance, a sentimental writer who lives on the beach and is among Stardew Valley’s romanceable cast. According to fan artists, he’s a willowy bishonen boy. According to ConcernedApe’s own art for the Mermaid’s Pendant card, a reskin of the existing Wedding Ring card, he’s a square-jawed Chad.

The Stardew Valley subreddit is not taking it well. They’ve called him a “Habbo hotel looking mf” and roasted his “Sheriff Woody lookin’ ass”. He’s been compared to Matt Smith’s character in House of the Dragon, Fabio, and a member of the famously inbred House of Hapsburg, while others declare “We have Elliot at home” and say “I might have to marry Alex now.”

Other cards show Penny with ringlets rather than the buns players assumed she had based on the in-game art, and depict Leah as substantially thicker than you might have assumed she would be. To be fair, most players aren’t complaining about the latter, or the glow-up Clint has received just in time to become a marriage candidate in the 1.7 update.

Personally, I like the way these cards look. Sword to Plowshares is a perfect Magic card to be given a Stardew makeover, and little details like the autopetter you can see inside the cave chest speak to a real affection for the, well, I guess it’s the deep lore of Stardew Valley. There’s even a card for the mayor’s purple underpants.

ConcernedApe’s illustrations in particular have always been a bit on the “programmer art” end of the spectrum, from the moment you see grandpa’s odd-looking bed at the start of the game. These are exactly the kind of human imperfections that give art personality, and make Stardew Valley distinctive among all the copycats. But I thought Elliott’s jaw seemed pretty robust even when seen in profile, so what do I know.

The Stardew Valley Magic cards will be on sale from 9 am on July 27 at the Secret Lair website. Meanwhile, Stardew Valley’s 1.7 update will let players romance both Clint and Sandy, and add a new farm type.