Animal Crossing: New Horizons got a big 3.0 update earlier this month, which alongside a lot of new content for everyone included a Nintendo Switch 2 upgrade with some fancy technological buffs. One of those was the ability to play with up to 12 total people on the same island, up from eight in the original version.
Sounds fun, right? Wrong. It’s a nightmare. A nightmare once again spawned by Nintendo handling online functionality in the most ridiculous way possible.
I was so foolish and naive a week ago, when I first had the idea to get 12 of us together for an Animal Crossing session. It would be easy, I thought! So easy, I originally didn’t even plan on writing anything about it! Let me just call up…11 other people I know who are still playing Animal Crossing: New Horizons.
Who also have Nintendo Switch 2s.
And somehow we’ll manage to find an hour we can all do this, despite everyone being busy adults.
Okay, harder than I thought, but we did it! Last night, a group of 12 of us all logged on at once with a plan to meet up on my island. We considered using the Game Chat functionality, but decided against it due to lack of compatibility with Bluetooth headsets, the function’s friending requirements, and the fact that you can’t take screenshots while Game Chat is active. Discord it was, then, apparently still the second-best place for Nintendo Voice Chat (after the podcast, of course).
The plan was for an hour-long session from 9pm to 10pm last night, but I recalled that the cutscene for people landing on the island was a bit lengthy, and we’d have to watch it 11 times, so I logged on half an hour early to open my island so we could start filtering in. I was hopeful that with improved Nintendo Switch 2 loading times, it might not be so bad. And it’s true, the actual loading times were notably faster, though most of the wait for people to land is a combination of said cutscene (“We’ll be making a water landing, but that’s OK because this is a seaplane.”) and everyone saving the game each time, so we didn’t really shorten the wait by that much.
But all that was to be expected. Here was where the nightmare began.
At 8:35pm, my friends began trickling in. We managed to get three people in before the entire session crashed, booting out everyone who had showed up so far and shutting my islands gates for me. I reopened at 8:46pm and we started again, this time creating a “queue” in our Discord text chat so everyone didn’t try to flood in at once. At 8:58pm, one of my friends got an error that kicked her out alongside one other person, but everyone else stayed, so we brought them back and continued down the line.
At 9:19pm, I typed in Discord, “WE DID IT” as person #12 seemingly landed successfully.
At 9:21pm, as person #12 strolled in, another error occurred and two other people got kicked out. At this point, my husband (who was playing Ace Attorney next to me) started rolling his eyes.
At 9:24pm, one of the people who had been kicked out tried to rejoin, errored out, and the whole session crashed again. Every single person got booted back to their islands and my gates were closed again, just as we were finally about to taste success.
Please enjoy this timelapse video, courtesy of our intrepid Wiki writer KBABZ, of 40 minutes of us trying desperately to get everyone onto the island, only for the unthinkable to happen right at the very end:
I was undaunted. By golly, we got all these people together, we were going to hit each other with nets and drop recipe cards for each other! We started again from the top. This time I forbade everyone from doing anything once they landed aside from standing still in a line next to the airport. No menuing. No talking to villagers. Nothing. Folks started coming back in at 9:27pm. At 9:37pm, the fourth person to join crashed the island again. At 9:39pm, almost 40 minutes after our planned start time, we began yet again. Everyone posted cat pics in the Discord channel for emotional support.
This time worked. Finally, at 10:05pm, after multiple crashes and false starts, we had 12 people on my Animal Crossing island.
I’m happy to report that after the 90 minute ordeal that was getting 12 people onto one island, online play actually worked great. We all exchanged gifts, took a pic in the Town Square, explored the island, and got coffee at Brewster’s. People wrote on my bulletin board and sent me letters. Some borrowed my Wario costume from the hotel. A couple people decided to play pranks, burying junk and trapping my villagers with holes. It was genuinely a pretty great time. It just, you know, took way too dang long to set up.
It’s baffling to me that Nintendo’s infrastructure for Animal Crossing is still set up this way. Yes, the island landing cutscene is very cute, and I do think the sea plane line is pretty funny. But why on earth do we need to sit through it 11 times, with everyone who’s not traveling collectively watching a mostly-blank airport-themed loading screen? Why does everything on my island need to completely freeze and exit menus so someone can come in? Why does Group Stretching require me to be Best Friends with everyone on my island? How much worse would all this have been if we had used Game Chat? Mario Kart World doesn’t have this problem!
The best explanation I can think of is that Nintendo genuinely didn’t intend for anyone to use this feature in the first place. Animal Crossing: New Horizons’ 3.0 update is fun, sure, but it’s not creating the same massive surge in interest that existed in 2020 when we were all locked at home and had nothing better to do than ponder whatever it is that Dodos do. You’re unlikely to ever need to collect 11 friends and drag them to your island all at once. Heck, given how hard this was to schedule, I’ll be lucky to get four one of these weekends.
Anyway, Animal Crossing: New Horizons is still very fun to play with friends, but it’s still a massive pain in the butt to actually set up the circumstances for that play to be possible. Next time I’ll just get everyone together for Jackbox.
We’re still checking out the big 3.0 update and all the fun new stuff that’s been added. We’ve catalogued some of the surprising little changes, including the ability to strafe and jump, and we’ve got tips if you, like us, are returning to your island after a long hiatus. Oh, and check out this Zelda stuff added in the 3.0 update!
Rebekah Valentine is a senior reporter for IGN. Got a story tip? Send it to [email protected].
Blogroll image screenshot courtesy of KBABZ.
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