A report from Kotaku stated that D.Va was at the top of Pornhub searches earlier today and I did my own research to ensure that the findings were accurate. They were.
Since Overwatch 2’s launch, the search for Overwatch-related porn has skyrocketed. At the time of this investigative piece, “overwatch dva” is fourth in Pornhub’s trending searches. “Overwatch 2” is in eighth, which includes a wide variety of heroes getting it on (but mainly Mercy, Tracer, Widowmaker, and Ashe, who was dubbed a “big ass slutty cowgirl.”)
Overwatch 2 came out on October 4 but the excitement over the game itself was short-lived. Most gamers weren’t able to play thanks to queue lines with 40,000 people and severe DDoS attacks. There was also that controversy over two-factor phone authentication that didn’t allow some gamers to log in. Gamers clearly got fed up with the state of the game and decided to watch their heroes in action elsewhere.
While it’s no surprise to see D.Va, Mercy, and Widowmaker pop up on Pornhub, the gaming community has been left wondering if Kiriko is safe from these heathens. And I’m here to tell you, so far her fox spirit is protecting her. For the most part.
There is currently one eight minute-long video of Kiriko on Pornhub that is just the support hero getting slowly eliminated by other heroes. It’s unclear to wholesome people like me why this video is on Pornhub at all when it more seems like a study of how long it takes for Kiriko’s health to be depleted by each hero. But I’ll take a wild guess and say that it has to do with hearing her cries of agony, which may sound oddly familiar to people who visit Pornhub.
It doesn’t seem like Kiriko’s voice is enough to please people with Pornhub accounts. The video currently has more dislikes than likes.
A quick Google search of “Kiriko rule 34” brings up a ton of results, however, but I was too afraid to click on any of the links so I cannot tell you what these consist of. But it just goes to show you that people waste no time when it comes to new heroes — even ones as wholesome as Kiriko apparently.
So there you have it. I did the research so you don’t have to. I know that most of you never would have done this yourself but were dying to know if Kotaku was telling the truth. As a long-time journalist, I felt it was my duty to do this to spare all Overwatch fans of having to even fathom doing something so vulgar. You’re welcome.